Demons & Zombies & Parachuting... Oh my!

Oh, how I love having boys... such interesting creatures.

Last night we had several power outages from the crazy winds that were blowing.  The first one was at about 10pm and lasted apprx. 1.5 hours.  During this time, Jake, Jackson & I sat in the livingroom in the dark and talked.  (apparently after seeing Paranormal Activity 3 last year, they were a little uncomfortable SLEEPING during a power outage... go figure... dark... sleeping...?  whatever.)  So we talked.

First up was Toby, the demon from PA3.  Would he or would he not come after ME?  I haven't seen the movie, but apparently either I would just be killed outright, or ignored... they couldn't come to an agreement about this, although I'm hoping for the latter.  They also discussed which side of the attic Toby might live in - each convinced that he stays above the OTHER'S bedroom.

THEN we walked about the feasibility of jumping off the roof into the wind using a bed sheet as a parachute.  Jake wondered how far he'd fly?  I wondered how hard he'd land.  Jackson just said he should definitely go for it.  Jake DOES live in a different version of reality than most of us...

The topic that got the most discussion was Zombies.  Jake wanted to make sure that we all knew our positions/duties just in case we were attacked by Zombies during the power outage.  Jackson, he said, was to man the upstairs windows.  Jake was going to unlock the shotguns and be ready to blast them through the upstairs bathroom window if they tried breaching the roof.  "I" was the downstairs person.  (????)  I would be armed with a machete (the unsharpened one he has hanging on his wall?...sigh) and if they tried to come in through windows or doors DOWNSTAIRS, I was to chop off their heads.  I told him I would much prefer to be the upstairs person.  "Fine," he said, "I'll come downstairs with the guns."  Why can't I have the guns???  Jackson brought up a concern... what if they were NAZI Zombies?    Apparently that is a whole 'nother situation, and I would be relegated to hiding upstairs while he and Jake took care of them, since they have experience (don't ask.)  Oh, and for some reason, the Nazi Zombies would come up out of the creek out back.  They said it could be an old burial ground.  "Nazi burial ground?  In my back yard?  In Texas?" I asked?  Ummm....  "Well fine," Jake said, "maybe they're INDIAN Zombies - which are even WORSE."  I personally have never heard of Indian Zombies - but I'm sure there are a lot of things I don't know about.

Meantime, Jackson SWEARS he hears an old woman outside screaming.  I tried to tell him it was just the wind, but he said he was pretty sure it was the grandmother from PA3.  I asked if we should go outside to help her and both boys screamed "ARE YOU KIDDING?????????  DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR!!  Gosh, Mom!"

OK then.  I'm going to bed... good luck with Toby, Grandma and the Zombies.  Let me know when I need to hide upstairs.  Love you and goodnight!

Chicken Paws

Ten Questions for the grocery store people who sell THESE:

1.  WHY??

2.  Chicken PAWS?  Is this really an accurate description? 

3.  What about the CLAWS?  Do people really eat things that still have fingernails attached???

4.  WHY???

5.  If you have been reduced to eating chicken feet... do you really care that they've been "PREVIOUSLY FROZEN" ???

6.  Why is the expiration date so far in the future???  I thought chicken was only supposed to stay fresh for 3 days or so?

7.  Couldn't you have arranged them a little nicer in the package?  It just looks so morbid... like a bunch of dismembered fingers...

8.  WHY????????

9.  Why do the short toes look so similar to human thumbs????  (shudder shudder)  The foot on the left kinda in the middle looks an awful lot like a HAND (minus a finger)...(shudder more)
10.  What part DO you eat? (not that I'm going to try it or anything... just wondering)
 
I stood in the grocery store for quite a while looking at these... mesmerized.  I am sure they've been there before - but I've never seen (I'm SURE I'd remember!)  Then a lady came up beside me (buying a DIFFERENT chicken part) and saw me looking at the feet, obviously shocked, and said, "I suppose you could use them for stock...?"  I said I preferred my stock NOT to be made with feet or fingernails.  She agreed, bought her boneless/skinless breasts, and moved on.
 
Of course - now I had to investigate.  If asked, say... Friday? whether or not I believed people ate chicken feet - I would've said,"of course not!"  I was apparently wrong.  This is what I've discovered:
   
*  Chicken feet do make GREAT stock - our grandmothers used them along with the necks and backs and such.  Thankfully you do need to chop off the claws first (ugh... that leaves me out right there!)
*  Most of the recipes (other than stock) are Asian.  I'm still just not understanding what part you EAT.  Isn't it just skin and bones???
*  You can fry, braise, steam, boil (oh gosh - there goes the old gag reflex), & make soup from chicken feet.
*  I am a wimp... I would never be able to cook OR eat the recipe for Dim Sum Chicken Feet.  It starts out:  "The feet are fried first, then marinated, then steamed.  Make sure to WASH the chicken feet first and chop off toenails. Cut the feet into quarters."  Seems like washing would be a no-brainer, but the chopping off of the toenails and cutting feet into quarters is way beyond my raw chicken cooking tolerance.
 
If you're interested in recipes (or just want to be grossed out) follow this link to cooks.com:
 
http://www.cooks.com/rec/search/0,1-0,chicken_feet,ff.html

I'm done... probably won't eat anything today... goodbye.

Fish Heads, Fish Heads (Roly-Poly Fish Heads)

Be careful what you wish for.

Yesterday I was wishing for something to photograph.  Something NEW.  Something DIFFERENT.  Something INTERESTING.  Was NOT expecting to see THIS on the way to dinner... (then again -  would a person EVER expect to see this?):

Bet you can guess what I DIDN'T have for dinner...

What would possess a person to put giant catfish heads on his fenceposts? (this paricular one has HORNS...and possibly teeth...and is staring at me.)  Giant, real, live (well... used to be alive) whiskered catfish heads.  WHY?  WHY would you do that?  What is the message he is trying to send?  Maybe he just finds the t-posts boring?   Was there a gang of air breathing, 2-legged catfish prowling around eating fenceposts and he just lopped off their bodies and left their heads?  Maybe he doesn't like his neighbors?  Maybe it's a warning of some kind?

Another thing I'm struggling with is why haven't the local varmits eaten the fish heads yet?  Surely the racoons and vultures should have picked the bones clean by now?  And shouldn't there be FLIES? 

Apparently the birds don't like them, either.  

I'm also hoping this person doesn't have a tank/pond on his property big enough to GROW these giants.  Surely he found them somewhere ELSE and brought them home to decorate his fence... ???  Maybe 'decorate' is the wrong word here.

You know... catfish aren't the best looking animals to begin with.  But gosh... their decapitated heads are U.G.L.Y.  

One theory I have is that maybe it's a superstition of some kind?  Like... I just heard recently that if you kill a rattlesnake and throw it's body over a barbed wire fence, it will rain.  Now I'm not prepared to TEST that one or anything, but maybe... maybe it's some sort of fishing superstition?  A tribute to the catfish gods?  Pure speculation, but weirder things have happened, you know.

So... I got my interesting photo(s).  Different?  yes.  Weird?  yes.  Bizzare?  yes.  Disturbing?  maybe. 

That's all I have to say...for now.

 

Please help me remember...

Someone help me remember WHY I have dogs.  Really... why?  Why would I ever WANT to have creatures that chew up everything they get get their teeth on, dig up all my flowers, drag road-kill into my yard, harrass the cats, chase skunks, eat cat poop and generally relish in anything horribly stinky & rotten?  Why?  WHY, I ask?!

I woke up this morning a few minutes before my alarm clock went off.  Well, ok... before my alarm clock went off AGAIN (I had pushed the snooze button a couple of times already.)  As I lay there pondering WHY I was awake, I heard a snuffling noise.  As I absorbed the implications of the snuffling noise, I noticed a SMELL.  Ohhhhh noooooooo.

Precursor to this story:  We have 3 heelers.  They sleep in our laundry room at night.  They cannot sleep outside because, "out in the country" (where we live), dogs tend to hunt the neighbor's livestock at night... as in the kill-and-eat kind of hunt.  Kinda shocking to "city folk", I know, but it is what it is.  We had to learn this the hard way with previous dogs (so sorry about the goats and chickens...)  So, like our werewolf friends, they have to be inside during the killing hours between dusk and dawn.  We put up a gate on the door to the laundry room to keep them in.  It's just a baby safety-gate... nothing major.  We've been doing it for several years now - NO problems.  The dogs could easily knock it down if they wanted, but in general, they're good pups and stay in until we let them out each morning.   IN GENERAL.

Ok back to today... Apparently these monsters, who usually behave themselves at night, DID NOT last night.  When I smelled the smell and jumped out of bed to see what it was this morning, ugh... you can't even imagine.  The catfood was gone... the entire box of "Large Breed" dog biscuits was gone and the box totally shredded (and for some reason bits stuck to the floor), 2 ink pens were destroyed (??? how did they get those???), rugs were overturned and wadded up, several of my cookbooks that were on the lower shelf of the hutch were demolished... shredded... half-eaten.  And then... THEN there was the poo.  Oh, dear God, the poo.  There were piles of poo in the laundry room, three or four in the kitchen, two in Kelly's office, and SEVEN OR EIGHT IN THE LIVING ROOM ON MY NEW CARPET!!!!  I about fainted.  My new carpet... my new carpet I had waited EIGHT years for.  Now a poo field.  The field of poo.  A litter box for dogs.  Devastation... depression... WHAT?  How on EARTH could 3 dogs poo that much?  Were they saving it for a week?  I mean, COME ON!  Did they drug me and have a dog party last night, because SURELY this volume of poo couldn't possibly come from THREE dogs?  Unimaginable.  I would have taken photos as proof, but, really, who wants to see poo photos?  I know I don't.   On top of all that - you KNOW If there's poo, there's GOT to be pee.  I don't know WHERE exactly, but I know it's THERE.  Sigh...

Needless to say, my super-fantastic-heroic sons and I cleaned it all up.  I don't know what I would have done if they hadn't been here.  Probably packed up and moved out.  They cleaned up the worst of it then I finished the kitchen and Resolved the carpet, etc.  Now I'm sitting here waiting for the Stanley Steemer guys to come steam-clean my abused carpet.  They are scheduled to be here between 10am and 2pm.  It is 3:12pm.  Please, please, please tell me they are running late... but ARE coming.   

So, yes... someone please tell me WHY I have dogs?  IS there a reason?  DO I love them?  DO those sweet eyes melt my heart?  DO I love puppy kisses on my chin?  OK, fine. Yes.  Yes, I do love them.  Yes, they're irresistable.  Yes, their sweet puppy faces tug at my heart.  But, shhhhhhhhh - don't tell them!  They're still in trouble!!!! 

Priorities...

Just in case you were wondering, I DO have priorities.  I'm not always completely random... scattered... frazzled.  REALLY.   In the mornings my priorities are usually to make sure the boys eat a decent breakfast (is banana pudding a "decent" breakfast??), wear semi-matching clothing (incuding socks that actually go together), and brush their teeth before leaving for school.  Sometimes I even remember to remind them to grab their backpacks on the way out the door.  In the afternoons my priorities including remembering to pick up boy #3 from school and shuttle him to and from whatever sporting activity he is supposed to be at on whichever day (sometimes it takes more than one brain to remember it all, tho). 

Today, however... TODAY's priority was our annual Bluebonnet photo shoot.  I tried to do this last weekend but it was soooooo very sunny... everyone was squinty and washed out (and some mean person on the highway honked at me and made an ugly gesture while I was trying to make the best of the situation!)  Rude person.  

I knew it was supposed to rain today so had been planning on trying again early this morning.  I woke up at 7:30 and it was PERFECT outside - that perfect overcast sky that makes all the colors just GLOW.  I let the boys sleep... for another half hour (hee hee - mean, huh?) and then woke them up, promising them What-a-Burger breakfast taquitos when we were all done.  This, by the way, is the most awesomest bribe ever - really gets their rears in gear ... except Justin who's version of "hurrying up" means taking only 30 minutes to get his clothes on and brush his teeth.  Whatever... we were out the door by 8:30 - woo hoo!

First stop... County Road 403.  Both sides of the road absolutely lined with bluebonnets... nevermind the prickly mesquite tree or the cactus.  I certainly didn't mind them.  The first shot of the day was this.  What you can't see is that I've had Jake tuck a mesquite branch behind his head (it WAS in front of his face - and that will never do.)  It is poking him in the scalp with it's thorns.  I told him to be still and it wouldn't hurt very much and it'll only take a sec for me to snap the pic.  Should have checked the LCD display and retried - he's got a funny look on his face... sigh.  After this I told them to squat down so I could get them more in the flowers.  Justin says, "Mom, there are cactus."  I said, "Just don't SIT on

it."  Justin replies, "If I squat, I'll HAVE to sit on it."  My response?  "Squat PART of the way down to where you're not touching the cactus but it LOOKS like you're sitting."  Priorities, dear, priorities.  What's a little cactus pain when there are photos to be taken???  So he did and I got this one.  Seeeeee - everything was just fine!  :)

Down the road a bit farther I got this one.  Probably a good thing Justin didn't SEE Jackson behind him.  Older brothers are a persnickety bunch, sometimes. 

Then, when Jackson spontaneously put his arms around his brothers'... the whole shot degenerated to this...

God forbid he touch them... LOL

By this time it had started to sprinkle.  No worries - a little rain won't hurt anyone (or a camera when you've got it covered in a zip-loc baggie!)  Funnily enough, the boys didn't even complain about standing in the rain.  I got one of my favorite shots of the day when they were just walking away from me down the side of the road.  I guess they know it takes more than a little sprinkle to change my mind about a photo shoot.  Good boys, they are... have the right priorites, too!  :)

I did end up with several great shots to go with the ones that didn't turn out so perfectly.   And we are happy to report that we encountered no snakes, no scorpions (but there WAS one in my kitchen tonight)... no traffic hazards were created by stopping on the side of the road to take bluebonnet photos.  I'm even pretty sure no one was bitten by fire ants.  Can't promise that though - it's such a common thing around here, it might not have been mentioned...  I didn't have to threaten anyone for not cooperating.  No child was actually harmed by mequite thorns OR cacti... sigh... a VERY good morning!

This Car Stops...

Good morning!  Well, I HOPE its a good morning, anyway.  It's been a CRAZY morning here, but good so far.  :)  (this is my neighbor, CB, by the way - isn't he handsome?)

The first thing I want to say is how grateful I am that I live in a small town and don't have to deal with rush hour traffic in Austin every day.  I would lose my mind (or whatever's left of it!)  I had to take Jackson to a doctor's appointment in Austin yesterday afternoon... we got done at 4:45... oh joy.  Just in time to join the hoard of people sitting on Mopac!!!!  Yay me!  BUT... at least I had something to ponder during those long minutes... (where's Arsenio Hall when you need him, hmmmmmm?)

Hmmmmm.  Hmmm, hmmm, hmmm...

WHEN?
...when it's out of gas?
...when there's a cow in the road?

For WHAT?
...for garage sales?
...for baby ducks?
...for the heck of it?
...for NO reason?
...in the middle of busy intersections?
...at railroad crossings?
...randomly?
...low water crossings?
...for Bunco?
...obviously on Mopac during rush hour


At least we know it DOES stop - it's not a Toyota... hee hee.

 

Obviously...

We went to Universal Studios yesterday.  We figured the boys would have a better time than at Disney (??? what kind of logic were we using?)  I do have to say that the Hulk rollercoaster was AWESOME!  So was the other big one that I can't remember the name of... at the other park... ummm ummm ummm... ROCKIT!  That's the one - VERY intense.  MIB was fun - shot a lot of aliens.  Got to meet the Grinch (although the boys were on another ride and Kelly wouldn't pose with him... grump!  LOL) 

I did get the boys to pose with Wolverine (didn't take much convincing - he's pretty much cool!!)  and we ALMOST got a pic with Captain America... but he had to leave.  sigh...

We got to wear funky nerd 3D glasses on the Spiderman ride.    The special effects were great but it made me motion sick... blech!  :)

Harry Potter wasn't open... it opens next week, I think.  :(  They also had the Dueling Dragons ride shut down - will reopen as part of the HP stuff.

The Jurassic Park River Adventure ride wasn't open either, so Justin & Jackson just stood in the splash zone to get wet while they tested the ride.

Even though the boys are all too old for us to play in the Dr. Seuss area, Jackson did get a Cat-in-the-Hat hat - such a cutie!

All-in-all it was a pretty good day.  Not a bad place... but Universal is NOT Disney.  Not by a long shot. You'd think that would have been obvious.  :)

What do they have against chickens?

Day 3 of vacation with the family.  We have discovered something disturbing at our otherwise AWESOME rented house on the beach here in Anna Maria Island, Florida.  Apparenty there are giant chickens roaming the area.  No, that is not the disturbing part... that would be that it seems they bury these giant chickens with their feet sticking out of the ground.  Maybe to scare the others away?  Hmmmm... giant beach chickens.  As you can imagine, the other birds are concerned about this brutality...  I met gulls and sand pipers and pelicans (oh my) convening on the beach to discuss.  

(I also discovered beach doves hiding in the sea grass...doves on the beach???)  I would be worried about this if I weren't reasonably sure that chickens are NOT carnivorous. 

Tune in to our regularly scheduled vacation blogging later...

Two Facts & Two Questions

Just a few quick thoughts tonight...something that just occurred to me.

Fact #1:  My home phone number is very close to our local police station's number.  The last four digits of MY number are 1136... the police station is 3611.  I learned this within 2 days of moving into our new house in 1999.  We moved in on a Thursday, got our first call Friday night about midnight.  It went something like this:

Me - "Hello" (veeery sleepy voice)
Caller - "Is this the police?"
Me - "ummm, no???"
Caller - "This is not the police station?"
Me - "No, this is my house."
Caller - "Did the police station change their number?  What is the number for the police station?"
Me - "I don't know.  All I know is you called my house.  What number did you dial?"
Caller - "Are you NEAR the police station?"
Me - "No..."
Caller - "Is this 693-3611?"
Me - "No - this is 1136, you switched the numbers."
Caller - "Are you sure?"
Me - "Well... I think so..."

Anyway... this has happened many, many times.  Usually on weekend nights, especially on Holidays, and ALWAYS after midnight.  Why do people call the police station after midnight, anyway?  Wouldn't they dial 911 if there was an emergency?  It used to aggravate me, but now, even in my sleep, I can tell them the correct number to dial.  No problemo.

Fact #2:  I am the registrar for the local soccer association.  Approximately 57 billion people in Marble Falls and surrounding towns have my phone number (give or take a few...lol) and it's posted on the association's website and registration flyers, too.  A lot of people call me... a LOT... mucho lotto.

Question #1:  If so many people who are trying to call the police station call ME... how many people who are trying o call ME, call the police station?  Hmmmm???  I never stopped to think about that before.  Until tonight.  Tonight when I got home from soccer practice (and, God help me, "Junior Parent Night" at the High School which-I-am-totally-not-prepared-for-but-that's-another-story) and had TWELVE, yes TWELVE new soccer voice mails.

Question #2:    Should I call the police station and see if I have any messages?????

To farm or not to farm... THAT is the question.

So.... FarmVille.  You either love it or you don't.  Well... maybe not.  I have differing opinions, depending on the day.  But, bottom line is - I play FarmVille.  Although "play" might not be the right word.  Farming is WORK, people!  So many decisions, so much to be done, so many animals, a virtual (literally) forest of trees... sigh.  It all leads to a few (ha!) observations/questions/comments on the whole little world of Farmville:

1.  Scale... I know it's a virtual world, but it's a little freaky when the horses are as big as the tractors, the tractors are too big for the barns, the snowmen are as tall as the eaves of my log cabin, and the turkeys are as big as the cows. Not a big deal, to be sure, but worth mentioning.  Let's just say if I were a chicken, I would definitely be afraid of the rabbits...

2.  Let's go back to the cows.  I have regular brown and white milk cows.  I have brown cows (that give chocolte milk - VERY cool).  I have pink cows that give strawberry milk.  I also have GREEN cows from space that give milktonium.  Who buys that stuff?  Maybe the aliens that made my crop circles?  I even have little green calves!  They ARE kinda cute in their martian-ness.  The calves bring up another question - what are they FOR?  All you can do is brush them.  Who brushes a cow baby?  Why?  I'm glad I get PAID for it, but still... ???  And apparently these are eternal calves - they never grow up... it's like a Neverland for them.  I want to know why I can't sell them for veal.  Oh come on, now - you know it's what would REALLY happen.  I'm being overrun by these little varmits - why not let them be useful?  I feel the same way about all the lambs... ever heard of LAMB chops? 

3.  Still on the subject of bovines... what about those bulls?  They can be very entertaining.  You can have one bull in each barn (with 19 cows - lucky guy).  I have 5 barns with a bull in each.  I have several other bulls that have no barn to live in.  They know where they WANT to be, though - as soon as I moved them to the pen in front of the barns - they all went and stood looking in at the cows.  Kinda feel sorry for them.  The scary thing is - I have to brush THEM, too.  I don't know about you, but a brushing a bull is not high on my list of fun things to do... or safe.

4.  Then we have the reindeer.  I have a whole herd of them...half of which are still tangled in Christmas lights.  What do you DO with reindeer after Christmas?  Since I'm not allowed to send them off to make sausage or jerkey - they just stand there waiting to be...can you guess?  Yes..waiting to be brushed. 

5.  Chickens.  Chickens, chickens, chickens.  I have approximately 512,917 chickens... and ONE chicken coop that holds 20.  WHY can't we have more than one coop?  We can have as many cow barns as we want... why not chicken coops?  I also want to know why we don't have buildings for all the other animals... doesn't seem too much to ask.  I've got goats (good gosh do I have goats), sheep, reindeer, horses, baby elephants (who produce circus peanuts??), rabbits, penguins, ducks and all sorts of critters with nowhere to live.  I don't know about YOUR farm, but it's snowy on my farm... is it too much to ask to have horse stables, rabbit hutches, pig sty's, goat & sheep barns...??  I'm not really sure WHAT penguins would need... maybe an igloo? 

6.  And pigs.  Pigs that harvest truffles.  I always thought that was only in England, but obviously I didn't know the whole story.  Why not ham, bacon & pork chops, hmmm?  No piglets yet - I guess because they can't be brushed.  The horses "product" is a little strange, too - you collect horse hair.  Tell me - what do we use horse hair for nowadays?  I'd like to know.... really. 

7. Because I don't have enough to do on my farm, I have cats.  About a billion & three at this point... all needing to be brushed on a regular basis.  Don't get me wrong - I LOVE cats.  But FV has given me TWO "Cat Lady" awards in the last week or two.  Is that supposed to be a compliment?

8.  Moving on past the critters... there are TREES.  Loads and loads of trees!  It's really an amazing environment where banana, date, apricot, passion fruit, fir, walnut, avocado, cherry, all manner of citrus, olive & sugar maples can all live together...in the snow.  I did have to break down and sell about 3/4's of my trees, though.  There wasn't enough room for me and the chickens to walk around.  I was afraid I was going to get permanently lost.

9.  I really have an issue with the storage facilities.  I have 3 large storage barns and five sheds  I am only allowed to keep 28 items total in these buildings.  Tell me - when was the last time YOU saw a storage shed with only 4 things inside?  I think, depending on your packing ability, the storage capacity should only be limited by your creativity.  I'm pretty sure one whole shed is taken up by the hot air balloon I just can't bear to get rid of...and then there is the alien plant monster I will use again later... but the rest of the stuff is pretty small.

10.   At one point, I had all my ducks in a row (ha ha - pun intended) - but they will NOT stay that way.  Shouldn't be surprised - they are migratory creatures after all... just saying. 

So - I know there's someone out there saying "If these things bother you - just quit playing."  But if you know me AT ALL, you know that isn't possible.  Me and my OCD personality could never let all those poor critters (virtual or not) perish from neglect... nor let my crops go unharvested (I've almost got the gold medal for raising squash!  I'll even get a sign to post!) or all the baby critters...and frustrated bulls... go unbrushed and unkempt.  Who would pick all the fruit?  Who would gather the turkey, swan & goose feathers?  Who would make sure the cats don't harrass the turtles?  How could I ever SLEEP AGAIN?  Sigh... my biggest problem now is that I have discovered Zoo World.  More beasties to care for...train...breed...feed.  As my alter ego (The Wicked Witch of the West) would say... what a world, what a world!!!!  :)

Thankful...

Once again I am at odds with myself.  I hear /read all of my friends posting about things they are thankful for... friends, family, good health, sunrise, sunset... you know.  All of those wonderful things (and I'm not being sarcastic... really!)  It makes me feel guilty that I do not do the same... but I just cannot bring myself to be so... what's the word?  Traditional?  Maybe.  Normal?  Probably better.  I am VERY thankful for all of those things, but as most everyone knows - I rarely express my thoughts quite like everyone else. 

I wrote a blog last November about a few of the things I was thankful for (here's a link if you want to read it: http://www.scrapbook.com/blogs/103603/view/131911.html )  I thought maybe another list was in order for this year...

1.  The automatic gate opener... just imagine - I used to have to GET OUT OF THE CAR to open the gate every time I needed to go somewhere.  THEN... I'd have to get out of the car to SHUT it again.  How did I manage to survive all those years with that kind of torment????  Thankfully, now I don't have to brave the rain, heat, wind... sigh... technology is my friend.

2.  Reading glasses.  Ok - let me get something straight right off the bat - I am NOT thankful that I need reading glasses.  I went FORTY YEARS (good gosh how did I get so old??) without needing glasses of any kind... well - I did need sunglasses (preferrably pink ones with rhinestones) but that's different.  All of a sudden, after turning 40 last December, I cannot read my magazines so well at night when I go to bed.  That really stinks, by the way.  I finally broke down and got a pair of reading glasses (the weakest ones, at least) not too long ago.  WOWZER - what a difference it makes.  I have learned, though, not to try to walk around with them on - it just doesn't work so well when the floor looks like it's closer than it is!

3.  Toilet Paper... enough said.

4.  The Beatles.  Gotta love 'em (and if you don't, I don't wanna know!)  John, Paul, George and Ringo are with me every day on my iPod and on my wall.  No... no poster.  But I do have a Beatles calendar this year.   She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah...

5.  Ambien.  It is simply amazing the amount of things I can get done in a day when I sleep more than 1 1/2 hours each night.  Who'd have thought? (I'm a much nicer person, too - just ask my children!)

6.  Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.  Omgosh if you haven't tried one of these, you HAVE to!  I don't know how they work, but with my 3 sons, 4 dogs, & 2 cats, I don't CARE how they work...black magic for all I care!  I used one to clean my glass-top stove yesterday... it had a stain that I had been scrubbing at off and on for 6 months (I had let something with milk in it boil over and it permanently attached itself to the stove... smelled good, too!)  It didn't even take a lot of scrubbing to get it off with the Magic Eraser.  Cleans pencil & pen marks off the walls, too.  Now, granted, I'm not sure WHY I have pencil & pen marks on my walls.  I thought that by the ages of 11, 15 & 16, the boys would have outgrown writing on the walls.  Not that it happens OFTEN or anything... but I guess I was WRONG.  AND I'm pretty sure the teenagers have little to do with it anymore...

7.  Sirius Satelite Radio (in my car).  I'm afraid I'll never be able to live without it again.  I'm addicted.  SOOOOOO many channels to choose from!  Did you know that Martha Stewart Radio has a show with the Pet guy from the MSL magazine (Marc or something like that)??  He's kinda... interesting.  I'm pretty sure he wouldn't approve of the living arrangements for my pets, being that I don't have luxury condo's for them and all, and don't feed them gourmet dog/cat food.  I'm also pretty sure he'd be horrified for all of the critters that are slaughtered by my pets, too (skunks, mice, snakes, armadillos (????), squirrels)...city boy that he is.  hee hee

8.  Air Freshener/Febreeze.  Oh dear Lord, if you don't have one, you have no idea of the stink of some teenage boys.  The smell in Jake's room is enough to knock out a gorilla some days.  I think he goes through a can of Febreeze every couple of weeks...  I don't think the carpet will ever be the same, regardless.  I don't even know HOW many air fresheners he has in there... the plug in ones, the Renuzit thingies, the motion sensor one.  Heaven forbid he go to sleep with door shut... when his SHOES are in there.  Last time he did that, some weird, green, living-funk smell escaped under the door and infected the whole upper floor.  I don't know how he breathes.  I'm sure this will have some sort of long-term effect on his lungs...possibly his brain, too.  Weird thing is - Justin's room doesn't stink at all.  hmmmm.

So there you have it... things I am very grateful for.  I also should add color printers, camera lenses, pink roses, cordless phones, spray starch, Johnny Depp, fluffy kitties, and chickens with Phyllis Diller hair-do's... but I don't have time.  :)

...thoughts on the eleven-year-old boy

You know... I am not surprised by many things that my boys do or say.  I pretty much expect 2-year-olds to have tantrums... and teenagers to look at me like I'm stupid... and curfews to be broken ever so slightly (but Mom - the clock in my truck says it's 10:57!)... but my youngest son, at 11, does surprise me at times.  It must be kinda confusing being 11.  On the verge of adolescence, but still really a little kid.  On the other hand - maybe it would be FUN being in that in-between area... still being able to CHOOSE if you're going to be a big kid or a little kid?  I remember that I still played with Barbie's, loved to play baseball with the boys, had just started babysitting away from home, and started 7th grade when I was 11.    Oh gosh... that says it all, doesn't it?!? 

Anyway... here are some of the things my CURRENT 11-year-old does that surprises me:

1.  Writes on himself.  Markers, pens... legs, feet, hands, arms...really doesn't matter.  I do not understand WHY, even though I've asked him.  Apparently he gets bored at school sometimes.  I ask why he doesn't draw on paper instead... he says I don't understand.  Yesterday he came home with a Pedro mustache drawn on his face.  HE didn't draw it... another boy did. Because he had drawn one on him.  OK then.  Perfectly sensible.  (sigh... can't BELIEVE I didn't get a photo of the Pedro mustache before I made him wash it off - what was I thinking???)

2.  Sits on the couch upside down reading a book (head hanging off the seat of the couch, legs in the air...you get the idea).  I'm pretty sure I used to do this, too, but that doesn't make it any easier to comprehend.  And why did he wait until NOW to start doing it?  He's been reading nearly all his life... are the stories more interesting upside down? 

3.  Drops things on the floor at random times... trash, shoes, books, remote controls... whatever he happens to have in his hands - as soon as something else catches his attention - poof - dropped right there.  When I ask him 'why???' - he actually doesn't realize he's done it.  Sheer lunacy.  He used to have a longer attention span.  I think.  Hmmmm.

4.  Girls.  OK - I know it's normal... but a little disconcerting that all of a sudden he LIKES them.  Does that just happen in 6th grade?  I don't remember the other 2 talking much about girls - but that could be because they had each other to talk to and didn't chat with me about it much.  Oh well... I guess it had to happen. 

5.  OK - this one kinda stresses me.  He is obsessive about deoderant & colognes (puts on deo 3 times/day and about drowns me out with Axe body spray...) but isn't real big on brushing his teeth yet (althought I make sure he DOES brush 2x/day!!!).  I tried to tell him that stinky-breath cancels out cologne & deoderant.  Hopefully one day he'll listen.  It might take a girl telling him he has bad breath, tho.

6.  Hides his dirty socks.  I find balled up socks in the STRANGEST places.  Not just under the bed & in the closet... places he had to FIND to hide the socks... places that it woud have been easier for him to put them in the laundry than there... like behind towels in the linen closet.  Or behind the VCR in the TV cabinet.  Or under pillows on the couch.  I've even found them under his mattress.  The boy has a serious aversion to the laundry room.  Or maybe he's leaving little presents for me... stinky-feet presents?  Maybe wants me to think of him while he's away at school each day?  Wishful thinking, I know.

None of these things make me particulary ANGRY... sometimes it's aggravating, but mostly just...interesting and a lot of times funny.  He is a great kid... still tells me he loves me several times each day.  Makes me laugh all the time (sometimes at the same time he makes me want to strangle him.)  He's got an AWESOME sense of humor - as shown in his choice of Halloween costumes this year.  He wanted to be something "different" but we couldn't think of anything in time.  So he decided to buy a silver skeleton mask and a black, hooded cloak and just be a scary guy.  At the last minute, he ran back upstairs and got the finishing touch to his outfit... a plastic afro.  It was hysterical - Justin & Jake were calling him the "African King."  I thought he looked like one of the aliens out of the movie "Mars Attacks" (I think that's the one, anyway.)   

Sure wishing he could stay this age for longer than he will...